Wednesday 19 June 2019

2019 Fast 7.0 - Dry Fast Day #3

63 hours into the Dry Fast - 69.75 Kg
I lost another KG since yesterday and I hope I will continue this trend for the next couple of weeks. After all what are two weeks in the length of a lifespan? A drop in the ocean!
Today I feel ok, yesterday night I had to work till 2:00AM and the evening felt endless. I worked from 3:40 PM to 2:00 AM - 10.5 hours! It was a real struggle arriving till the end of the working night. I don't like anymore this job, it's too hard for me working three jobs, I should quit. For now I just asked for a week off and see if I can rest a bit more. The only good thing of this place is that I do not eat the staff meal ever there and I work and walk a lot. Just yesterday I did more 20K steps based on my phone tracking, but it wasn't a record anyway, I did 25,000 on a Friday working till 3:00 AM.
I didn't check my Ketosis yet but I'm sure it already started, I want to be strong now and keep on fasting until I can.
I had a couple of glass of water last night while working. The job is really demanding so I was getting dehydrated. But it was an isolated episode, I was good after drinking and I didn't feel the need to drink more. Dry Fasting is way easier than Water Fast.

Tuesday 18 June 2019

2019 Fast 7.0 - Dry Fast Day #2

41 hours into the Dry Fast - 70.7 Kg
Today my mood is really low, almost depressed and I really don't know why. All the existential doubts of life are coming up in my mind. I should be more chilled and repeat to myself that I do not care about anything, I should be happy to be healthier, smart and just beautiful as I am. But it's not always so easy, I have moments of real depression and moments when I'm happier or careless. I sent few sms to my man showing some concerns about our relationship - he is so young, but I didn't receive any reply yet, and although he might be just sleeping, my mind always goes in negative thoughts, catastrophic reasons on why things are not-happening! I'm wondering if this is also a form of detoxing, I'm just saying out loud whatever goes into my head, bad or good things. I even have the desire to tell all the opposite things to my boyfriend now; but I'll abstain to do that or he might think that I'm crazy...which I'm not!
The Dry Fast is going good so far, no sign of hunger or thirst; but it's been also just 41 hours anyway. My brother in law started with me his first prolonged fast, but he drinks water every time he feels really thirsty, still good though, as first-timer he is doing great.
Since yesterday I lost almost 2Kg, it's a huge number that I wish I could keep on seeing every single day of my Dry Fast! But I know it is just temporary, I will stabilize on 800/900 grams per day going forward, which is still a good average anyway.
Tonight I'll be working at my 3rd job - an event venue here in downtown, so from 3:45pm to 2:00AM or so I'll be walking around serving food and move furniture from one room to another one. This job is really demanding on my body, I just hope it will be worth it - in terms of calories expenditure. I'll check tomorrow my Ketosis and my weight again.

Monday 17 June 2019

2019 Fast 7.0 - Dry Fast Day #1

12 hours into the Dry Fast - 72.05 Kg
And here I am again, trying to start a new Dry Fast as much as I can. I've been putting off this begin since weeks now, is never the right time and the desire to eat something is always stronger than my strengths. But every time I hope this time will be better and I should never give up after all.
I've been seeing someone lately, and although it is still in the early stages in the relationship, I feel a lot of attraction towards him. He likes me the way I am but I'm not comfortable with this body, and before we can be intimate, I would like to lose weight, to feel pretty with him. I really don't want to have sex with him with this big gut of mine, I don't feel sexy at all and I won't enjoy it if I have to be concerned about my body.
I hope I will find the motivation I need to keep on fasting and to be disciplined with my food intake. I gained a lot of weight in the past few months, it seems that no matter what I do, I cannot lose my weight. Sometime I wonder why I don't do anything to lose all these extra KGs? Why I'm ok on being overweight and do nothing about it? I'm sure I didn't give up on my weight, but at the same time I feel powerless when it comes to fast or losing anything in general. I can be good for few days and then I'm back on binging on sweets. I'm tired of this yo-yo dieting.